You Know Your Symptoms the Best!

October 4, 2013 at 5:56 pm | Posted in 2013, Abilify, Abilify Maintena, Anti-anxiety meds, Anti-depressants, Anti-psychotics, Anxiety, Anxiety Attacks, Bipolar, Borderline Personality, BPD, Brain, Bulimia, Compulsive Eating, Compulsive Exercising, DBT, Depression, Eating Disorders, EDNOS, Education, Haldol, Haldol DEC, Haldol Decanoate, Happy, Health, Injections, Kristin Bell, Lithium, long-acting injectables, Mania, Manic, Manic-Depressive, Mental Health, Mental Illness, Mood Stabilizers, negative symptoms, Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, ocd, Paranoid Schizophrenia, Prescription Meds, Psych Meds, Psychiatrist, Psychiatry, Psychiatry Denial, Psycho, Psychoactive Substances, psychoanalysis, Psychology, Psychosis, schizoaffective disorder, Schizophrenia, self-care, Self-Harm, Self-Injury, stigma, Stress, Support System, symptoms, treatment, Zoloft, Zyprexa | Leave a comment

pills

Recently I made a medication change (with the help of my psychiatrist), and as you might know from your own interactions with meds sometimes it can cause issues to develop. I was happily strolling along for a couple of months with a few bad days here and there, and then I started to notice the bad days piling up more often. I was really irritable, sad, became unmotivated, and suicide starting sounding better. I became alarmed, because I knew something was going wrong, but how was I supposed to explain to my psychiatrist that “irritable” is a symptom for me?

The problem with mental illness is that even when we fit into a diagnosed category of disorder, we all have our own unique symptoms that we need to pay attention to. I have schizophrenia, but for years I didn’t appear “sick enough” to most doctors, because they expected me to be talking to the walls and completely disheveled. There were times when I was talking to the walls and completely disheveled, but the doctors rarely saw me during those times, so they figured I wasn’t that bad off. Because I could communicate relatively well most doctors dismissed schizophrenia as a diagnosis.

Over the years I have come to realize what my symptoms are (for the most part), and now that I am doing better I can advocate for myself more effectively. However, it still isn’t easy to call up my psychiatrist and say “wow, I’m extremely irritable, this isn’t normal for me, and I need to increase my meds.” Most psychiatrists won’t believe that “irritable” is in any way related to schizophrenia, but for me (and many others) it is. I don’t become psychotic over night, and I don’t believe that I should have to be talking to walls in order to get the help I need. I also don’t believe that people should have to try to kill themselves before mental health professionals take people seriously.

Unfortunately, a lot of mental health professionals won’t take a person seriously unless they are debilitated to the point of needing to be hospitalized. So, as people living with mental illness or people who love people with mental illness, we have to be very proactive about getting the help we need before it turns into a crisis. Think about the good days and what you are like on those days, and compare them to the bad days. What are YOUR symptoms? How do things manifest in your day to day life? You might want to write down what you know your symptoms to be, and take that list with you when you talk to your doctor. It isn’t easy or fun, but we have to advocate for ourselves even when we are not doing our best.

In the end, you know your symptoms the best. Remember that you aren’t “crazy” for wanting to feel better and you aren’t making up excuses. Be pragmatic and straightforward, and get the help you need.

Spoonflower Now Has Giftwrap!

May 27, 2013 at 5:39 pm | Posted in 2013, Animals, Art, artist, arts & crafts, Cat Leap, Cats, Children, circles, Colorful, craft, creative, Cute, design, design your own fabric, dots, drawings, for sale, gift wrap, green, Happy, Illustrated, iPad Art, Kawaii, Kitties, Kitty, Kristin Bell, Panda, panda bear, paper, spoonflower, stripes, unique wrapping paper, wrapping paper | Leave a comment

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In addition to wall decals, fabric, and wallpaper, Spoonflower.com now has gift wrap! I got two of my designs in the gift wrap. The first is the panda in circles, and the second is the small kitties playing! I LOVE the gift wrap! It is so much fun! Check it out if you get a chance and create your own too! :)

Zoey’s New Bow Tie!

March 6, 2013 at 9:41 pm | Posted in 2013, bow tie, Cat Break, Cat Stories, Cats, Fashion, Happy, Kitties, Kitty, Kristin Bell, Oregon, Pink, Portland, Sweet Pickles Designs | Leave a comment

Just got this bow tie for my kitty Zoey from my favorite cat shoppe, Sweet Pickles Design. Check out their new website here: http://www.sweetpicklesdesigns.com/

Pickles is the cat that inspired the creation of the company. What’s even better is that they are based in my own area—Portland, Oregon! Yay for Sweet Pickles!

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The Pink Brigade!

February 12, 2013 at 12:41 am | Posted in 2013, Art, artist, arts & crafts, Cats, craft, cuddle, Cute, dolls, fabric, Handmade, Happy, hearts, Hello Kitty, Kawaii, Kids, Kitties, Kitty, Kristin Bell, pig, piggy, pillow, Pink, plushies | 2 Comments

More handmade dolls, made by me! :) I made these for a cute little girl who going through a tough transition time right now. :) They have different coordinating fabrics on the back. :) This time I experimented with using little pre-made ribbon flowers instead of all bows. I think it looks great! :) What do you think?

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Thirsty Kitty! Meow!

February 3, 2013 at 1:18 am | Posted in 2013, AVPPet, Cat Break, Cat Stories, Cats, Cute, drinking, drinking fountain, feline, Happy, Kitties, Kitty, Kristin Bell, Pet Care, pet supplies, Pets, thirsty | Leave a comment

Lots of New Kitties!

January 5, 2013 at 11:22 pm | Posted in 2012, 2013, Animals, Art, artist, arts & crafts, Birds, Books, Color, Colorful, cozy, craft, Cute, design, dolls, dots, fabric, feathers, feline, Friends, Fun, green, Handmade, Happy, hearts, Hello Kitty, Holidays, Kawaii, Kids, Kitties, Kitty, Kristin Bell, ornament, parrots, plushies, polka dots, ribbon, scarf, sewing, sewn, snowman, Stuffed Animals, Valentine | Leave a comment

I’ve been busy over the holidays making more and more kitties! They are so fun! :) Here are pictures of some more of them. :)

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pinkhellokittykitty

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Cupid Fabric Just Rolled In! Yay!

December 20, 2012 at 6:57 pm | Posted in 2012, 2013, Art, artist, arts & crafts, Colorful, craft, creative, cupid, Cute, Decorating, design, design your own fabric, drawings, fabric, fabric design, Handmade, Happy, heart, hearts, hobby, Holidays, Illustrated, iPad Art, Kawaii, Kristin Bell, Love, Pillows, quilting, spoonflower, Valentine, Valentine's Day | Leave a comment

I wanted to share the cupid fabric I made with you guys! It just came today and I love it! I went a little crazy with the cupids! haha. If you are interested in checking out these and other designs I’ve created, click on this link: http://www.spoonflower.com/profiles/kristinbell

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Some New Kitty (or Bear?) Ornament Dolls

December 9, 2012 at 7:58 pm | Posted in 2012, artist, arts & crafts, Beach, Bears, blue, Cats, Children, Christmas, craft, creative, Cute, design, dolls, fabric, feline, Friends, Fun, green, Handmade, Happy, Hello Kitty, hobby, Holidays, Horses, Kawaii, Kitties, Kitty, Kristin Bell, ornament, pillow, plushies, sewing, sewn, Toy, yellow | Leave a comment

I can’t figure out now if these are actually kitties or bears or some weird hybrid! lol. I decided to make some of these kitties for different people using different fabrics. Here we have: green kitty, beach kitty and horse kitty! :) SWEET! I’m currently in love with these little things! lol

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beachkitty

horsekitty

Merry Little Elves Wreath

November 24, 2012 at 11:23 pm | Posted in 2012, Art, artist, arts & crafts, Christmas, elves, Handmade, Happy, Holidays, Kristin Bell, merry, pillow, Pillows, plushies, sewing, sewn, wreath | Leave a comment

I just completed this little wreath that I made to go with my candy canes! It turned out fairly well for my first ever attempt at such a project! Yay!!!

Some New Pillows!

November 24, 2012 at 2:34 am | Posted in 2012, Angelica Kauffman, Art, art history, artist, arts & crafts, body parts, Cat Break, Cats, craft, creative, cuddle, Cute, Decorating, design, design your own fabric, drawings, fabric, fabric design, feline, female, feminist, for sale, Fun, funny, gender, Goofy, Grrls/Women, Handmade, Happy, Humor, In Other Words, Kristin Bell, Magic, Mary Moser, pillow, Pillows, plushies, Portland, sewing, sewn | Leave a comment

Here are some new pillows I’ve been working on. I’m going to be selling on consignment at In Other Words in Portland, Oregon. I’m pretty excited about it! The first one is Henry Miller Magic cat with red stripes. The second one is Judy the Utie(rus) with minis on the back. The third one is a pillow of Angelica Kauffman and Mary Moser having tea.

Henry Miller Magic Cat Pillow

Henry Miller Magic Cat side view

Judy the Utie(rus) pillow

Judy the Utie(rus) backside

Angelica Kauffman and Mary Moser Having Tea pillow

Back of Angelica and Mary pillow

 

 

 

Stuffed Hello Kitty Turkey Video

November 17, 2012 at 6:43 pm | Posted in 2012, Cute, Happy, Hello Kitty, Kristin Bell, plushies, Stuffed Animals, turkey, Video | Leave a comment

Hot Off the Presses: Blue Frog Kitties!

August 19, 2012 at 11:32 pm | Posted in 2012, Art, arts & crafts, blue, Cat Break, Cat Stories, Cats, cuddle, Cute, design, dolls, fabric, Frog, green, Handmade, Happy, Kawaii, Kitties, Kitty, Kristin Bell, pillow, plushies, sewing, sewn, Stuffed Animals | Leave a comment

Blue Frog Kitties Front

Blue Frog Kitties Back

 

I just finished my blue frog kitty project for my friend who likes blue and frogs. I hope she likes this! :) I used the frog fabric on the back of both the big kitty and the baby kitty this time. :) Click any of the pics to enlarge. :)

August’s New Kitties!

August 18, 2012 at 11:23 pm | Posted in 2012, Art, arts & crafts, Cat Break, Cats, Colorful, craft, Cute, dental, dental hygienist, dentist, design, dolls, fairy, fairy cat, Fun, Goofy, green, Handmade, Happy, Kawaii, Kitties, Kitty, Kristin Bell, Panda, panda bear, plushies, sewing, sewn, sneakers, spoonflower, Stuffed Animals, Teeth, Toy | Leave a comment
The Teeth Kitty

The Teeth Kitty

Front of the Cat Fairy Kitty

Front of the Cat Fairy Kitty

Back of the Cat Fairy Kitty

Back of the Cat Fairy Kitty

Panda Kitty

Funky Shoe Kitty

I’m pretty sure the people I have made these kitties for don’t read my blog, so I’m going to post the pics of new kitties I have made! The first one I just finished today for a wonderful young woman who just completed dental hygienist school. I’ve known her since she was born actually! I found the cute teeth fabric on spoonflower. I think they are just adorable with their pink cheeks! hehe. The second cat I made for my aunt’s friend. It is different on the back, because the back doesn’t have fuzzy fabric, but instead the flying cat fairy fabric. The last two I made especially for a friend who lives far away. The shoes reminded me of his new sneakers that I saw on facebook, and I know he likes pandas, so I wanted to do a panda cat for him. :) Click any of the pictures for a larger view. :)

Pink Kitties!

June 14, 2012 at 4:26 am | Posted in 2012, Art, arts & crafts, Cat Break, Cats, Children, Colorful, Cute, design, design your own fabric, dolls, fabric, fabric design, feline, Handmade, Happy, Kawaii, Kitties, Kitty, Kristin Bell, Pink, plushies, sewing, sewn | Leave a comment

Pink kitties in the works!

Right now I’m working on these pink kitties. I’m making the eyes with felt instead of buttons, because it is for a baby. I’m hoping that babies don’t eat the other stuff on the kitty! lol I’m sewing the stuff on pretty tightly, but babies can be strangely strong! The fat fairy on the pocket is my own design! :)

My Panda Fabrics!

June 4, 2012 at 10:47 pm | Posted in Art, art journal, arts & crafts, Bears, Black & White, Decorating, design, design your own fabric, drawings, fabric, fabric design, green, Handmade, Happy, Illustrated, iPad Art, Japanese, Kawaii, Kristin Bell, Panda, panda bear, quilting, sewing, sewn, spoonflower, stripes | Leave a comment

All Over Pandas Fabric

Pandas Stripe Fabric

Two of three of my panda fabrics arrived today from spoonflower! Yay! I think they look really cute! The third one (that might come tomorrow) has dots. I’ll post that when it arrives too! :) Yay for pandas! :)

Oh, and here are the links for the fabrics:

All over pandas: http://www.spoonflower.com/fabric/1202926

Panda stripes: http://www.spoonflower.com/fabric/1202991

 

Superhero Cats!

May 29, 2012 at 12:46 am | Posted in 2012, Art, arts & crafts, Boys/Men, Cat Stories, Cats, Children, Colorful, craft, Cute, design, dolls, fabric, Friends, Fun, Goofy, Handmade, Happy, Kawaii, Kitties, Kitty, Kristin Bell, Pets, pillow, plushies, sewing, sewn, superheros | Leave a comment

This is my latest cat project. I’m working on two superhero cats for two different little boys. I’ve finished one of the big cats and two baby cats, but I still need to make the capes for the baby cats. Update: I finished one baby cat cape! Adding pic now. :) I got the supercute superhero fabric from Hawthorne Threads. (Here is a link to the Superhero Fabric) They have some of the best fabric around in my opinion, but I am also glad that the Joann Fabrics near my house has a big selection of fleece! :) If you click the pics you can see an enlarged view. :)

Baby superhero cat with cape (front view)

Baby superhero cat (back view)

Superhero Cats!

Superhero Cats in Production!

Mental Health Update: Monday, May 28, 2012

May 28, 2012 at 1:18 am | Posted in 2012, Abilify, Acceptance, Anti-anxiety meds, Anti-depressants, Anti-psychotics, Anxiety, Autobiography, Bipap, Body Image, Body Narrative, Brain, Buspar, Depression, Diary Rant, EDNOS, Fat, Fat Acceptance, Fat Hatred, Haldol, Haldol DEC, Haldol Decanoate, Happy, Health, Injections, insanity, Kristin Bell, Medicine, Mental Health, Mental Illness, Mood Stabilizers, Prescription Meds, Psych Meds, Psychiatrist, Psychiatry, Psychiatry Denial, Psycho, Psychoactive Substances, Psychology, Psychosis, schizoaffective disorder, Schizophrenia, Sleep, Sleep Disorders, stigma, Weight, Zoloft | Leave a comment

I thought I’d do a little mental health update, since it has been quite some time since I’ve blogged about my overall mental health. As some of you dear readers may know, I have schizophrenia. I first had issues with it when I was about 15. My first hospitalization was when I was 16. Towards the end of 2000 I got mostly stabilized with my Haldol injections and Zoloft. I haven’t been in the hospital since then! Yay! Quite a long run I’ve had and I hope it continues! For quite some time I had problems getting things done, being motivated and feeling down…that sort of thing, even though I was mostly fine. I think it was last year that I started taking Abilify and it has made a HUGE difference! I’m still taking Zoloft, Buspar, Haldol and some non-psychiatric meds in addition to the Abilify, but the addition of the Abilify was great. I’m doing really pretty well these days. Sometimes I have anxiety, although I think it might generally be related to performance issues with school. I also tried taking Topamax to help with weight loss, but I thought it might be making me stupid and giving me more anxiety, so I quit taking it. I think overall, the Topamax was not helping. It seemed like I was becoming less motivated and more sad with it. I also had that bad anxiety day that I wrote about recently.

So, I think I was just hoping for a magic weightloss bullet with the Topamax. It didn’t work. Boo. I have lost about 90-100 pounds though which is good, but I still need to be less sedentary. I’m also a believer in fat acceptance, but of course it is hard to say that I never want to try to lose weight. I would be an even bigger believer in fat acceptance if I wasn’t actually fat I think!!! hahaha. I know that sounds ridiculous, but it is kind of true. I can accept the hell out of everyone’s fatness, but my own! lol.

Anyway, enough about fatness for now. What I want to say is that I’m doing well on the whole. My sleep patterns have improved with my sleep apnea machine, and while I’m not sleeping on any kind of normal schedule yet, I’m getting sleep every day and mostly at the same time! I still tend to be somewhat paranoid, but I’ve found that opening up with people over the years on the internet has really helped me to realize that I don’t need to be afraid of everyone in the world. I still have some delusional thoughts that blow through my brain now and then, but I consider them to be more of a slight annoyance than a big deal right now. But seriously, it is because of the medicine. If I wasn’t taking my meds, and doing so faithfully, I would be in and out of hospitals and massively psychotic. Some people don’t believe me, because I “seem so normal,” but I have to wonder what THAT means anyway? And, I don’t know, it seems like I should be insulted when people say that to me, but I’m not sure why I find it so insulting! I don’t necessarily want to be abnormal, even though I pretty much am, but I think it just bothers me that people attach a kind of value judgement to the term “normal” as if “normal” is superior. It is definitely easier to live in the world if you are “normal,” but it isn’t the only way to be in the world, that’s for sure. Normal is just such a peculiar word, no?

So, I’m doing fine. Some anxiety here and there, some weird thoughts here and there…a depressed mood now and then, but mostly just good. Which is nice. Thank you meds and thank you lucky stars! So, that’s my update after living with schizophrenia for 24 years. Wow! 24 years! Man am I getting old!!! LOL.

Two New Kitties (Plus Babies) For Friends

May 16, 2012 at 1:47 am | Posted in Animals, Art, arts & crafts, Cat Break, Cat Stories, Cats, craft, Cute, design, dolls, etsy, fabric, Friends, Goofy, Handmade, Happy, Kawaii, Kitties, Kitty, Kristin Bell, plushies, Portland, sewing, sewn | Leave a comment

I just finished the pink kitties and I finished the purple kitties a couple of days ago. These kitties are going to some very special friends. :)

Purple Pineapple Kitties for Chille

I attempted to make a cape for the little kitty!

Like me, my friend Brandy M. likes pink and cupcakes!

A construction shot!

Baby Kitty for Sale! AHHHH!!!

May 15, 2012 at 12:28 am | Posted in Adoption, Animals, Art, arts & crafts, Cat Stories, Cats, Colorful, craft, Cute, design, dolls, etsy, fabric, feline, for sale, Handmade, Happy, Kawaii, Kitties, Kitty, Kristin Bell, plushies, sewing, sewn | Leave a comment

Well, I’ve done it! I put one of my baby kitty projects up for sale on Etsy! Here is the link if any of you out there in internet land are interested.

https://www.etsy.com/listing/99858007/strawberries-and-cream-kitty-and-baby

It is hard to part with my kitties. hehe. I’m so silly! (That is if anyone even buys them!) Anyway, the Strawberries and Cream kitties are among my favorites that I’ve made so far!

I’ll post some pics of them here too. :)

Under Construction

Strawberries and Cream Kitties

And New in Blue! A Kitty or Two!

May 7, 2012 at 11:20 pm | Posted in Animals, Art, arts & crafts, Cat Break, Cat Stories, Cats, chick, Colorful, Cute, design, dolls, feline, Handmade, Happy, Kawaii, Kitties, Kitty, Kristin Bell, plushies, sewing, sewn | Leave a comment

My newest kitty comes to you in blue with white dots and orange and yellow accents with a chick in her tummy and a baby in her pocket. She is wearing a little bell (as is her baby) and she has blue and black eyes! :) She is very soft and lovable too! :) The chick fabric I made with spoonflower.com and the orange fabrics I got on HawthorneThreads.com. The blue and white fleece I got a Joann Fabrics.

Kitty undergoing construction

Kitty with baby on board

Kitty with escaped baby

The Martian-naut!

September 19, 2011 at 3:15 am | Posted in Art, Astronauts, Astronomy, drawings, etsy, for sale, Geek, Happy, Illustrated, iPad Art, Kawaii, Kristin Bell, Mars, martian-naut, Space Travel | Leave a comment

This is my newest drawing, the martian-naut. He lives on Mars and is ready and waiting to greet Earth visitors. We better get there before he gets too old!!!

He’s for sale at my Etsy shop here : http://www.etsy.com/listing/82087266/martian-naut-space-print-from-original

Sculpey Cupcake Numero Uno!

March 23, 2011 at 3:33 am | Posted in Art, clay, Colorful, Cupcakes, Cute, Fun, Handmade, Happy, Kawaii, Kristin Bell, Pink, polymer clay, Sculpey, Sculpture | 2 Comments

This is my first sculpey cupcake. I just made it today and it is about the size of a real cupcake, but not edible. LOL

Kitten in the Snowpocalypse of February 2011 (click to enlarge)

February 24, 2011 at 5:06 pm | Posted in Animals, Backyard, Cat Break, Cat Stories, Cats, Cold Weather, Happy, Kitties, Kitty, Kristin Bell, Nature, Pacific Northwest, Pets, Photography, Snow, Vancouver, WA, Washington, Weather, Zoey | 1 Comment










iPad Drawings: More Fun!

January 29, 2011 at 10:07 pm | Posted in Animals, Art, Bears, Cartoon, Cat Break, Cat Stories, Cats, Colorful, Cute, drawings, Handmade, Happy, Illustrated, iPad, iPad Art, Kawaii, Kitties, Kitty, Kristin Bell, Nature, Pacific Northwest, Painting, Panda, panda bear, Pets, Skier, Skiing, Turtles | Leave a comment

Three More Pix I Made on My iPad!

January 28, 2011 at 4:59 am | Posted in Animals, Apple, Art, Bears, Card Art, Cartoon, Cat Break, Cat Stories, Cats, Colorful, Cute, Dogs, Happy, Illustrated, iPad, iPad Art, Kitties, Kitty, Kristin Bell, Pets | Leave a comment

eye heart apple

March 5, 2009 at 2:07 am | Posted in Apple, Blogging, Computing, Cool, Cult, Cute, Engineering, Fun, Function, G3, G4, G5, Happy, iMac, Love, Mac, Macintosh, Microsoft, Nerd, obsession, Olden Dayz, PC, Steve Jobs | 3 Comments

iheartmac

I just watched the documentary “Welcome To Macintosh” which I purchased for $19.84 (plus tax and shipping from filmbaby.com) and I have to say that it was pretty great. Okay, they couldn’t get an interview with Steve Jobs, but whatever. And, well, probably only Mac people would be so enthralled by this movie, but since I’m a Mac lover it brought me joy! What can I say? I’m not that hard to please! Why do Apple lovers love Apple and love to love Apple and love to talk about how they love Apple? Cult much? Meh! I’m not into cults at all, but I love my computer as much as it is possible to have a fondness for inanimate objects! I’m sorry. I can’t help it. My Mac is my portal to so much joy, you have no idea!

Oh, there are some good Continue Reading eye heart apple…

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